Appeasement is working

French President Jacques Chirac pointed to the decrease in burned out cars as evidence that his appeasement policy is working.

"A week ago, fourteen hundred cars were burned in one night. Last night, only two hundred eighty four vehicles were torched. Clearly this is a benefit of being in bed with Saddam Hussein, united against the violent American aggressor. I extend my hand of friendship to the insurgents who have recognized our partnership by burning fewer cars and schools."

President Chirac was eager to remind the public that Islam is a religion of peace. "Muslims are eager to be at peace in a world where all infidels have been wiped out in name of Allah."

Meanwhile, President Bush held emergency cabinet meetings to determine if America could still get the preferential treatment that France is receiving.